


Here Is Boring

by queen_scribbles



Category: Pillars of Eternity
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-31
Updated: 2018-03-31
Packaged: 2019-04-16 05:32:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14157873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queen_scribbles/pseuds/queen_scribbles
Summary: Tavi gets bored without adventure and writes a friend





	Here Is Boring

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt fill for @pillarspromptsweekly 28: Epistolary. Kinda short because writing is not Tavi’s favorite thing to do. And her story-telling abilities are nowhere near her bff’s.

 

Dear Kana,

If I’m completely honest with myself, I’m not even sure you’re going to fucking read this. I hope you do. Otherwise this’ll be a waste and I hate writing letters. If it’s a waste, I might be forced to kill something. But you mentioned some of the places you were planning to visit if you had the chance, so I’m going to pick one, send this there, and hope for the fucking best.

Nothing is wrong, first of all. I wouldn’t ruin your adventures by sending you bad news you couldn’t _do_ anything about. I’m not that mean. Nothing’s really right, either, since all the rest of you had to go your own ways and I’m the only one left here. I wish I wasn’t. I wish you were here. Or, actually, I wish I was there. With you. Having adventures. Here is fucking boring. Nothing exciting happens here.

Well, alright, that’s a lie. My ex-almost boyfriend from a few years ago showed up about a month back. Right on the heels of Aloth leaving, of course, because the gods think it’s funny or something. We worked things out in the end, and parted on decent terms, but that was... not fun, but also not boring.

Oh, and there was an assassination attempt on a ducessa who was staying here to work out trade agreements. They were pretty fucking god assassins, too. ~~Actually made it to her room before--~~   I should start at the beginning, shouldn’t I? By the way, if you tell Aloth this story before I get a chance to, I will kill you. Don’t know if you’ll see him first, but you never know.

Anyway. Ducessa Fiorra wrote me awhile ago about using Caed Nua as ‘neutral ground’ for signing some trade agreement she planned to offer whoever the fuck took over Defiance Bay. I was fine with that, though I warned her I’m practically a member of the Dozens, who were looking like the most likely authority. She still wanted to do it here, because the location’s neutral or something diplomat related that doesn’t make sense to me but whatever. So we make arrangements, the Dozens agree to send someone to negotiate, she arrives with her entourage, everything seems fine. 

But the Dozens get delayed by a riot, need all hands to calm things down--thank fucking Hylea they listened to me and at least took advice from the Crucible Knights--so the Ducessa was at Caed Nua for a fair few days before they showed up. The second night she was here was the one with assassins. I missed most of it, ‘cause I actually managed to _sleep_ that night. (Sure, the Watcher shit hasn’t been such a problem, but I’m still adjusting to sleeping alone again. Don’t laugh at me) But from what Keya told me, they snuck someone in with the extra help I hired to account for how many guests I was expecting, and that person  unlocked one of the smaller wall gates. She thinks probably the one behind Fyrgen’s lodge, since it’s the most obscured unless Fyrgen happens to look out one of his windows, which he almost never does. They snuck their way across the grounds and into the keep, and honestly I think they would have succeeded if not for two things(I told you; they were pretty fucking good): Ducessa Fiorra is a very light sleeper, and Keya had decided to patrol the hallways for extra security. Sure Fiorra’s not one of the ducs bels, but she’s still pretty fucking important. 

 Because the ducessa is a light sleeper, she heard her door creak open, saw  someone about to _stab her_ , and screamed and threw her blanket over the closest one, who tripped on it and fell over. The other one decided to cut his losses and run for it. He practically tripped over Keya--who was more focused on the one actually in the room(as the greater threat)--and then ran into me, cause it’s hard to sleep with a screaming woman right down the hall. I hadn’t taken the time to grab a weapon, so I just punched the motherfucker in the stomach. He swung back, caught me a little with one of his knives, but I punched him in the face and put and end to that. Almost broke my hand on his blazing skull, but I knocked him out. ~~(seriously, don’t tell Aloth if you see him before I do~~ ) Keya killed the other one in the process of keeping him away form the ducessa, and mine wouldn’t talk--still won’t, and he’s been in the dungeons for ages--so I have no idea who sent them or why they wanted to kill the ducessa. (maybe I’ll give the assassin a tour of the top couple levels of Od Nua. That’ll get him talking)

Anyway, the ducessa was rattled but grateful, insisted Keya stand watch in her room for the rest of her visit, but she did reach an entirely amenable solution on her trade agreement with the Dozens, when they showed up. Happy endings all around. Except for the dead assassin. But fuck him.

Aside from that, it’s been pretty boring. Same thing day after day after fucking day. Gods, maybe I’ll run off and have my own adventures. No, wait, there’s something Edér might need my help with.... So I’ll just have to stay here and hope you send me more adventure stories, I guess. I miss you, Kana, but I hope you’re enjoying yourself ~~more than I am~~.

Your friend,

Tavi


End file.
